Kids at Mass - Part 2

I have a great follow up to the post that I wrote about a month ago about kids at Mass.

We were asked to be the Godparents to a wonderful little gal who has a special place in my heart. We celebrated the baptism recently and we were so blessed to be with her family that day. However, when we walked into church the community may not have felt so initially blessed to have us.

Picture this...big echoing church, 7 children ages 3 and under, 8:30 Mass...Suffice it to say, our families hair color did not match the majority of those in the congregation for this Mass.

As parents, we were sweating it. I was just praying that mine didn't decide the throw her head back in protest in the middle of the baptism and konk her head on the font...I do believe a comment was made in jest about repeating the other kiddos baptisms (which isn't canonically sound, by the way, once you're baptized, that's it!) or perhaps considering an exorcism!

There were a few outbursts and a few anxious moments, but overall the kids did beautifully! After a particularly long Mass (1.5) hours we didn't have anyone giving us the stink eye and we had a new member of the Church!!!

After Mass we were taking pictures. After all, how often are our two families actually dressed to the nines with our hair done??? As we were heading down the aisle with the priest to take our photos we were both commenting on how well the kids did and the priest looked at us and said,

"Your kids did wonderfully. Kids are our future. We cannot be a pro-life church and complain about how much noise they make or how they need to be breastfed at Mass. We can't speak out both sides of our mouth. As for me, I can always talk louder than they can. And that's the end of my sermon." And he said it all with a big smile.

Wow...what an affirmation. For a couple of families that regularly struggle with our beautiful children in Mass there couldn't have possibly been a more powerful statement made.

Frankly, I'd considered driving 45 minutes each weekend to be a part of that priest's congregation.

Praise the Lord that Singing is Like Praying Twice!

We had company a few weekends ago. My best friend and college roommate came for a quick visit to see us, although I do suspect that her adorable Godson was more of the motivation. We shopped, we ate, we relaxed on the back deck.

Before bed on Saturday night I said to my dear friend (who happens to be the daughter of a United Methodist minister and of the denomination herself), “Say Jess, would you be willing to watch the kiddos tomorrow morning so Kevin and I can go to Mass without them?”

I am not one that believes in not bringing your children to church when they are young, but quite frankly it is virtually impossible to establish any focus with our two monkeys climbing all over us.

Well, being that she has spent nearly as much time learning the Catholic tradition as the Methodist due to the nature of her schooling and is in a searching state at the moment, attending various churches and denominations, she replied, “No, if you wouldn’t mind, I’d really like to go. I can help with the kids.”

Ha.
LOL.

The only good things about that Sunday Mass were the facts that we arrived on time and the church didn’t have air conditioning. Arriving on time allowed us to sit in front so that the only poor soul watching our children was the priest and the fans, which lack any effective cooling properties did effectively drown out most of our children’s chatter, whining, and admirable attempts at singing. We only had one removal and one sickening thud of head against pew.

As I dripped sweat and seethed over the dirty looks the priest had given us (didn’t Jesus say “Let the children come!” – and I bet those kids weren’t exactly quiet either!!!), and my blood pressure sky-rocketed. We hadn’t even peeled our thighs off the pew after the closing him when my dear friend turned to all of us and said, “Next time, I’ll keep the kids.”

While that statement alone is enough of a punch line, I’m working hard at looking for the bright side. Perhaps God is in fact SO GOOD that my song (the only thing I can do wholeheartedly at Mass anymore) counts as praying twice!

UPDATE: We've been having a debate over here at the parish office about appropriate behavior/parenting at Mass. We had an older parishioner scold a young mom for letting her little one pace the pew. This is not a new mom, but one with some seasoning. What are your thoughts? Leave me a note. Is welcoming children a matter of hospitality or is it inhospitable to the others around them? I'll weigh in with our opinion shortly...:)

The RED Hour

At our house the "red hour" is any hour in which preparation for an event departure takes place.

The most regular occurance of the "red hour" is Sunday mornings before Mass. Oddly enough, or perhaps not so oddly to you mamas and papas out there, the hour before Mass is probably one of my least holy of the week. As a sort of examination of collective conscience, let's review.

First Commandment (You shall have no other gods before Me)
Yes, there were several moments where I considered that skipping Mass might be easier than giving John Ross a last minute bath to extract the yogurt and maple syrup from his hair.

Second Commandment (You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain)
Yes, Clara's incesant whining has elicited several "Jimminy Cricket!"s and "Good Lord!"s from my otherwise careful mouth.

Third Commandment (Honor the Sabbath)
Yes, I work for the church and have been known to work on Sundays. Working on Sunday is not so much the issue as is the fact that I don't take equivalent time later in the week to focus on quality family time. I have been known to get myself so wrapped up in my work, the laundry, the bills, and the family errands that I have neglected to make myself free to love my family and take time to rest. Even after creating the world (and you can bet God knew how badly we were going to mess it up by the next day), God took time to rest.

Fourth Commandment (Honor your father and mother)
Yes, I have neglected my role as mother by denying the importance of my spiritual life. I have not treated myself with patience and given myself the necessary prayer time with God.

Fifth Commandment (You shall not kill)
Yes, I have barked retorts and ordered my husband into action in a frustrated attempt to get us out the door on time. I have treated him with disrespect and killed his otherwise cheerful weekend demeanor.

Sixth Commandment (You shall not commit adultery)
Yes, I have put clean toddler tights and trousers ahead of my husband's pants. I have put my children and my need for community approval ahead of his needs.

Eighth Commandment (You shall not bear false witness)
Yes, I have been know to offer my children the example of a sarcastic comment such as, "Oh yeah, you're daddy is such help!", when in fact he deserves great admiration in their presence.

Ninth (You shall not covet your neighbor's wife)
Yes, in haste I have neglected my appearance and worn both jeans and oatmeal. In inattention I have dressed immodestly for the occassion of Mass with a dress that was perhaps too fitted or a skirt that was too short. I have not acted intentionally to protect the integrity of my husband and others.

Seventh Commandment (You shall not steal) and Tenth Commandment (You shall not covet thy neighbor's goods)
Yes, I have been known to take the last cup of coffee to soothe my Sunday morning nerves. I have also been known to get frustrated at the amount of time it takes my husband to get ready, not because of the time but because I want it too...

All jest aside, my examination proves our imperfection as parents. However, as my husband has so aptly and lovingly pointed out recently, we don't want to set the stage for Mass inside the "red hour". Mass is a celebration and most families don't like to start a celebration with an arguement in the car on the way over.

This weekend let's work together to have a collective "white hour". That is, an hour of peaceful preparation and loving interactions. And if it means we have to start early, so be it.

I'm setting the alarm for 4 a.m...:)