I guess I've just been busy...March and April virtually disappeared in all of the planning and execution of our parish's Stewardship Month.
But...I'm back now! With a vengence! And a baby-on-board!
So that is the topic of this first long-anticipated diatribe...our baby!!!
Before anyone asks, natural family planning (NFP) worked just perfectly. We used the standard days method for the first 9 months of our marriage and decided this spring that we were ready to welcome a baby into our marriage. And if you know anything about NFP, once you've determined your fertile days it is pretty straightforward when you start trying to conceive...as long as everything is healthy. Many health professionals are now recommending NFP methods as methods of conception not just prevention.
So no, NFP worked great! We still swear by it and I have every intention of going back to it after this baby.
That little soapbox aside, the next question is, how do we feel about being parents?
We are thrilled! We feel so blessed. I think we were both surprised at how easy it was with all of the stories of infertility floating around us. We can't wait to welcome our new little life.
We are anxious...what is it going to feel like? Why did that happen? Is the baby healthy? All sorts of questions are swirling around us and causing constant thoughts and conversations.
We are thoughtful. What does this mean for our marriage? How will it change our relationship? Did we make the best of our time as a couple? What kind of marriage do we want to have after the baby comes? We love each other and want the best for our family and our marriage.
I am sick. There are days when I wonder if I will ever want to have another baby. I feel like I am in an alien body. There is no rhyme to my rhythms. There is no way to prevent my all-day sickness. There is no way to anticipate my teary responses to the slightest comment. I have sore hips and I am constantly using the restroom. AND I'M NOT EVEN SHOWING YET!!! I am beside myself just wanting to get back to some semblence of normal. And then I realize that my estimation of normal is never going to measure up again...cue teary response.
And yet, we are grateful. More than anything we are SO grateful. God has given us an amazing gift to care for. He has given us the great joy of loving and guarding this child of His on this earth for however long He intends. He has given me the strength and the breath to nurture this child for the past 11 weeks. He gives us each beat of our baby's heart which is strong and beautiful. God gives us our wonderful family who is showering us with love, support and affection.
And our heavenly Father has given us each other. Kevin is a gift for which I cannot even find the words. Our marriage is a foundation that will sustain us through anything. My vocation is first as humble daughter of the Most High, second as loving wife to my husband, and third as dedicated mother of the child in my womb.